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Ever have one of those moments....

Pat Whatley

New Member
When you're the only one working at the shop...you're at the counter with a customer and two more politely waiting...and suddenly you get that rumble inside that tells you that if you're not in the bathroom in 30 seconds you're gonna need a new pair of drawers?

...and you quickly make a lame excuse about "checking inventory" even though your entire shop consists of one giant room, an office, and a bathroom?

...then you run to the bathroom, and loudly take care of the problem knowing full well that the one layer of drywall between you and the customers isn't gonna stop the sound...if anything it seems to amplify it?

...and when you come back out five minutes later the three customers are fighting back the laughter to the point where one of them's eyes is watering?

...and you get so embarrassed that your hands start shaking and you're almost in tears?

:ROFLMAO:


Wasn't me....I was the customer with the watery eyes. The poor lady working at the upholstery shop who obviously ate the "all you can eat burrito bar" last night looked like she wanted to crawl in a hole and die!

Yes, it's third grade bathroom humor....and it's still damn funny.
 

gabagoo

New Member
LMFAO!!!! I indeed can relate as our washroom is similarly placed close to the front reception. I have learnt that you have to time the flush with gastronomic expullsion!!!! It's incredibly embarassing...I hope you shook their hands on the way out!!:U Rock:
 

speedmedia

New Member
Damn.... I just spit pop all over my monitor, desk and keyboard. :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO:

I have had this happen during the middle of a meeting before and I wanted to just run out the door and never come back.

Always seems to hit at the least reasonable time.

Thanks,
Kurt
 

TheSnowman

New Member
Never had that one happen yet..but this place is a maze, so I'd be good.

I did however have a friend that is in investments, and in a 10AM meeting, he sharted and had to "leave the room real quick to check something". He didn't know what else to do, so he took his underwear and threw them in the trash. No one knew anything different, until the next morning when they were in staff meeting, and he informed everyone he worked with that he'd been going "commando" all day, and none of them knew!
 

Billct2

Active Member
I worked in a shop where the "library" was in the back corner of the fabricating room.
Every day the boss would walk back from the art room and take care of business.
After which the back room smelled like we were downwind of a pig farm.
One day he came out after his visit and every guy in the shop had a respirator on....it was hilarious.
 

Arlo Kalon 2.0

New Member
Years ago, when I was in college, I drove a Culligan water softening co. route part time. The day before this particular run, I had a cookout/beer blast where I ate tons of roasted ears of corn, washed down with copious amounts of beer. It hit me in the truck like a ton of bricks. I whipped into a small country store and asked the lady at the counter where the bathroom was. She pointed to a door right behind her. I went in and instantly passed a six foot long diamondback rattle snake that smelled like a three day old dead bear. I breezed on out past her, wafting the aroma in my wake. When I got in the truck, I could actually see her thru the window gagging. I know this is TMI, but I love telling this story!
 

d fleming

Premium Subscriber
I worked in a shop where the "library" was in the back corner of the fabricating room.
Every day the boss would walk back from the art room and take care of business.
After which the back room smelled like we were downwind of a pig farm.
One day he came out after his visit and every guy in the shop had a respirator on....it was hilarious.


Ah ...the old warehouse grunt!
 

Border

New Member
That's a good one!
My band was playing at a bar a couple years ago and right in the middle of a song, our lead guiter player ran off stage (actually, it was more a controlled, fast waddle) trying to keep his legs together. Straight into the bathroom he went, which happened to have no door on the toilet stall and the main door was propped open at the time.

How in the hell do ya gracefully return to stage after that??? I was the one with eyes watering that time!
 

Pat Whatley

New Member
I had to get down off a bucket truck and duck behind some bushes once.

Lost my socks and a t-shirt that day.

I know a guy who works for the power company who keeps a roll of toilet paper, a bucket and some garbage bags in the bucket truck for emergencies. Apparently you can raise the bucket up all the way, do your business, and nobody can tell what you're doing.
 

Kottwitz-Graphics

New Member
I know a guy who works for the power company who keeps a roll of toilet paper, a bucket and some garbage bags in the bucket truck for emergencies. Apparently you can raise the bucket up all the way, do your business, and nobody can tell what you're doing.

Except the crop duster...

I once worked at a shop that didn't have a bathroom & it hit me after a long flight after a vacation... I hit the woods out back with a roll of paper towels & a shovel.

Anyone ever seen the ”bumper dumper”? A toilet seat on a 2" hitch receiver...
 

speedmedia

New Member
Except the crop duster...

I once worked at a shop that didn't have a bathroom & it hit me after a long flight after a vacation... I hit the woods out back with a roll of paper towels & a shovel.

Anyone ever seen the ”bumper dumper”? A toilet seat on a 2" hitch receiver...


lol
 

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Bradster941

New Member
Maybe this email I recieved today is appropiate to Wipe Up This Thread.


Maryanne a manager at Wal-Mart had the task of hiring someone to fill a
job opening.. After sorting through a stack of 20 resumes she found four
people who were equally qualified. Maryanne decided to call the four in
and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of
them would get the job.

The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table,
Maryanne asked, 'What is the fastest thing you know of?'

The first man replied, 'A THOUGHT..' It just pops into your head.
There's no warning.

'That's very good!' replied Maryanne.

'And, now you sir?', she asked the second man.

'Hmmm....let me see 'A blink! It comes and goes and you don't know that
it ever happened.. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of.'

'Excellent!' said Maryanne. 'The blink of an eye, that's a very popular
cliche for speed.' She then turned to the third man, who was
contemplating his reply..

'Well, out at my dad's ranch, you step out of the house and on the wall
there's a light switch.. When you flip that switch, way out across the
pasture the light on the barn comes on in less than an instant. 'Yip,
TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of'.

Maryanne was very impressed with the third answer and thought she had
found her man. 'It's hard to beat the speed of light,' she said. Turning
to BUBBA, the fourth and final man, Maryanne posed the same question.

Old Bubba replied, 'After hearing the previous three answers, it's
obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA.'

'WHAT!?' said Maryanne, stunned by the response...

'Oh sure', said BUBBA. 'You see, the other day I wasn't feeling so good,
and I ran for the bathroom, but before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON
THE LIGHT, I had already shit my pants.'

BUBBA is now the new greeter at a Wal-Mart near you!

You probably will think of this every time you enter a Wal-Mart from now
on!
 
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